How do I use social media to demonstrate my UG-ness?”. Because you don’t want me anymo 4 Answers. And consider if you even want him back. He messaged a few times to check on me and i told him not to unless there was something to talk about. However you are only a few days into No Contact so make sure that you spend this time working on your Holy Trinity and see how you feel nearer the end of your No Contact if you want to get your ex back and reach out or if you want to move on. Your updates tell me he has done the right thing for his marriage. Does this mean he’s going to move on for good? Knowing him I do think it's personal, not necessarily in a hurtful way but an end to an era perhaps. He didn’t want to do something one day and I just exploded, he then broke it off there and told me it was my fault. We began to have a lot of arguments as we were both going through our own personal struggles. My ex unfollowed me today on Instagram. Or his new fiance and he talked about your friendship and message which would be normal to come up in chat and he or they decided that you are just acquaintances now so best to let the past be. Is he angry after seeing my many updates? He told me that he was really lucky to have me and havent found my qualities in a long time .. then 2 days after he broke up with me because he s not drawn to the relationship, the same day he unfollowed me , i asked him why (shouldnt have..) and told me tht ir hurts him . 8 Reasons It’s Time To Delete Your Ex On Social Media. Punched you in the gut. . He blocked me. He just recently liked my Instagram picture.” That’s a great question, Ashe. I don’t understand, why is he doing this over a year later? Even if he may not show it or express it, he is probably wondering if he did the right thing. I just really wanted that platform to reattract. I posted a picture on Instagram earlier which was a little risqué…. If you do not want everyone to see certain posts, then you should definitely keep them private. It's possible that he did, and only now he has met somebody he wants to share his life with he wants to cut the cord which I could understand if that were the case.It's a shame he doesn't want/feel able to remain in touch albeit infrequently but I respect his decision and wish him all the best. Hi James I would suggest that you complete a NC on her as she is well aware you are waiting for her to come back – I would do a 45 NC and during that time be chatting to other girls so she realises she does not have a hold on you. However, you should only do it to the extent which you are comfortable. I did not react. When I hear about the downfalls of social media, its time consumption is often at the top of the list, so when I quit my accounts, I thought I would instantly become more productive. That being said, it’s normal that after a breakup, you and/or your ex may behave in ways that are different from what you’re familiar with. Do not react. The ways you'll benefit from avoiding your ex on social media go deeper than 'out of sight, out of mind.' If it is not possible keep to your LNC and spend as much time as you can away from him even if you stay out late with your friends. So my ex had broken up with me 2 weeks ago and since then he had been stringing me along saying he wants to get back, then he doesn't etc. My boyfriend dumped me 6 weeks ago and this past week I decided to delete him off of facebook, Instagram and snapchat. That kind brought back all the bad memories and kind of hurt. Delete them. It was like we were freaking soulmates!!!! What’s an Ungettable Girl? Whatever the case, leave it alone and move on. It may seem it won’t take a toll in your life, but it will — especially if you are the dumpee. Even if he was being a jerk, and trying to bait you to get a reaction out of you, then I can’t tell you how important it is to hold your ground and lift your head high. My ex and I were doing well. Rather, they paint the picture of a desperate and heartbroken person who is still hung up over her ex and can’t move on with life. It bothers him that while he’s still processing the breakup and trying to make sense of his feelings, there you are . Seeing your ex living their lives without you. Previously he’s unfollowed my calendar because he told me he was angry and annoyed (times when he broke up with me unlike this time). We still have lots of love for each other but we are not talking. Of course that night, he blocked me on everything and no longer sent me message back. I only did it because I needed time to heal and move on, and I made sure she knew that so she didn't think I was trying to be childish. I felt that he was doing all this to me so he had an excuse to break it off again. We hooked up and he stopped halfway through and said he didnt think he could do it and he actually liked me/enjoyed spending time together. We can now see what the ex looks like, and we can find out if they've moved on. In the end, he did the only thing he knew how to, and unfollowed you on social media. If you freaked out and started demanding why he unfollowed you, those negative memories can be triggered. I noticed that he religiously watched my insta stories until a couple of weeks a guy I when it became more sporadic. Could it be that he’s still hurting? To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account. Social media makes breakups way harder than they need to be, so you might want extra guidance during the aftermath. Social Media Breakup Etiquette: How to Handle Past Relationships on Facebook and Instagram . 0 0. And is texting and smiling in our online classes. ( 5 weeks ) I finally delete him because I thought why should you ghost me and still see what I’m up too. So i have been doing this 30 day no contact rule again, but im worried he’s not going to reach out this time, i unfollowed him that same day he told me that, but he didn’t and he would watch my stories without fail! Should I reach out to see how he is? I posted tons of photos after the breakup obviously hoping he’d see them and reinforcing the UG concept. You want to show your ex that you are “moving on.” Now, if you’re thinking in your head that you DON’T actually want to move on from your ex (that’s why you’re here, isn’t it? If you’re being UG, you are probably – and if not, you should – posting pictures of you having fun. Facebook. Hi Lucy, don’t focus on social media movements as this is usually done during emotional times for your ex. This article was very interesting to read! He will stalk, even if she made him unfollow you. It ended on good terms and there was no drama. It’s not a superficial change; it’s a real change. Also as I have been focusing on myself I have been posting stories and photos on Instagram of me having fun, enjoying life. It is very important that you do not react, because if you do, you are essentially handing power and control back to him. When your relationship ends, you want people to know. Had enough of my family. I won’t be in the country so I am giving him the space to do this himself. Why hasn't my ex deleted/blocked me off social media? But . About almost 2 months ago my boyfriend broke up with me , since then we've had like ups and downs but since 2 weeks ago we don't talk to each other anymore. What eventually made me delete him completely from all of my social media this week however is the fact that he's kept leaving me on read whenever we've been talking (always in … After our breakup he wanted to remain friends but it was too hard for me. my ex hasn't blocked/unfriended me on social media despite no contact . Work on your Holy Trinity and then when you are at day 31 you can reach out with a text or other type of message you prefer to speak with him, about something you know he is interested in and would have a short positive conversation, making sure you are the one to end the conversation first. I fear that he might hate or resent me for doing so. He throws maybe 200$ a month at me for payment while I see on social media that bought over 10k worth of studio and photography gear. Facebook. However, in a couple of cases, I’ve either deleted exes or they have deleted me. I haven’t replied because I was trying to move on and was in a lot of pain and anger. But there’s probably a part of him that isn’t ready to do that just yet. Today she deleted like 15 pics from her social media. He saw the message, but he didn’t reply. If you need help urgently, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide, which can point you to expert advice and support. I still love her but she seems very hesistent to make eye contact. Not sure how to feel I’m hurt because I still love him but I’m so confused. At any rate, there is a high chance that she is a rebound and you have very little to fear. They are: Reasons #1 and #2 show that you still affect him, and this is precisely what you would hope for. What was he doing, does anyone have an answers? He is the one that broke up with me. I sent congratulations because it felt like the kind thing to do, much like how he contacted me after the births of my children for example.I don't see him in a romantic way and haven't for a very long time. Your email address will not be published. Mikey. As I have mentioned before, he will naturally become curious at some point. I was hurt initially and cried my eyes out in front of him. Hey Emily, I can not tell you if you should move on or not that is up to you. I logged onto Facebook and saw that I was one friend down. Hi, When I first met my now-partner of four years, I explained to him that I hadn’t deleted my ex from social media and that we still checked in with each other from time to time. I said I missed him too and can’t wait for him to come home and be his partner in crime. I definitely think my ex is hurt and is trying to get over me. Hi, I need help please, I was in a long distance relationship for 3 years, during those 3 years we only broke up once, and after that we fell so hard in love we were freaking best friends we shared so much!!! Without social media reminders, almost no one remembers my birthday and I return the favor by remaining completely oblivious to theirs. The relationship was toxic and she got scared of it repeating itself, so she says, and she backed off. Allow him some space in that flat to worry why you are not home, who you could be with and when you get home go straight to bed so that he feels that he is losing you slowly. You need some mystery! It is sort of like a fresh start. If he reaches out to you in the next 45 days just ignore him. Thusly, claiming he didn’t know I posted. Don’t give it a second thought xxx, My money’s on the fiancé not wanting him being friends with exes. This can get highly annoying, and there’s simply no need to hold your emotions and your mood hostage to social media. NO sad posts about broken relationships and breakups, NO angry posts about how terrible men are, NO pensive posts about love or how ideal relationships should be, it gets under his skin/annoys him/angers him, is obviously hindering him from moving on, when you do notice, he wants to see you react, He is still hurting and processing the breakup, He is trying to get a reaction out of you, He was forced to do so by his new girlfriend, Will this post hurt/harm me in any way? First, thank you for having the guts to leave me a voicemail and ask this question. I’m 8 days into no contact and noticed he has now unfriended me on Twitter and Instagram. Image: Mashable/Bob Al-Greene By Chloe Bryan 2018-02-11 22:13:08 UTC. 1. You can’t fake it, because trust me, your ex will notice. In many ways, social media has made it easy for us to behave in ways that would historically be considered to have violated our partner’s privacy. I’m a great girl! What should I do? Ex has suddenly removed me from social media, why? We’ve officially been no contact for a month now. And today ( 3-4days after) he took me off his followers so i cannot see his instagram, i didnt react and not plannin on , i d love him getting back … we ll see. Perhaps he views you as the past and wants to focus on the future. I think he was just not ready to commit to someone. Take them off your feed. Men can be pretty darn immature, and the immaturity can manifest itself pretty strongly in circumstances such as a breakup. I see him all over dating apps so I know he doesn’t have a girlfriend. Close. When I agreed to gave it another go but I told him, this time we have to go all in, have to give it 100% which I did, I did everything, I tried to be everything he wanted me to be because I loved him so much & I really wanted it to work, I really tried so hard but he was the complete opposite. I would say he needs a break and this is where NC is important after a break up. You should definitely continue posting pictures of your new self on social media, and to the extent which you are comfortable, make your posts public. Exes on social media should be no threat to you, as long as they’re not purposefully causing problems for your relationship (in which case, delete delete delete). Should I contact one of his friends is something I’m contemplating can you please help me work this out on what to do from this point it’s been only four days but I’m feeling helpless I don’t know if he’s blocked me via phone but good chance he will not reply so just as well. If you want this to change then something has to change about you and your ex. For example: Imagine the impression that a woman will have if her ex only posts photos of him alone, or looking sad or bored. She then hooked up with someone else and proceeded to ask me to start as friends because she didn’t know if she could forgive me. (e.g. After all, do you really want to be with someone who doesn’t value you and only wants to mess with your emotions? I am really confused. 12 Signs You’d Be Way Better Off Deleting Your Ex From Social Media. Posted by 3 years ago. Follow. "I am very strongly against asking anyone to delete these kinds of photos. Follow. Been blocked / unfriended on social media by an ex after months of NC. After a month of posting I took a month-long break of posting and then on Halloween posted some nice pics of myself for the first time in a while. Far better to just have friends with no history or no close contact. He was constantly watching my stories and I did not watch his. Get your ex back with Coach Lee's Emergency Breakup Kit! I don’t know what I can do to let him know I still want to be friends. He will be wondering about these questions, and probably a ton of other questions as well. Hi Linda, I would have told you to stop him from being able to follow your calendar anyway as you do not want him knowing where and who you are with all the time anyway. Now I remember why we broke up.”. [Read: How to forget someone and move on fast] #2 It sends a message to your friends and family. I don’t know why, but I am kind of sad for some reason. Stupidly I invited her to an event last week to try and get her attention. This is a chance to move on and put an end to the immature era of your dating... BE NON-REACTIVE. If he sees you’ve posted this, he probably will, all of the above. It is. In his mind, you have broken up and he has lost you, so the next best thing he can is to try and move on. Good question. In fact, he may be experiencing greater pain since breaking up with someone definitely takes courage. “A really important thing to do upon a breakup to help you move on in a healthy way is to cut social media ties with your ex, not in a malicious or angry way, but in a considered ‘if we are going to get through this’ way,” says Dunne. I only discovered this tonight and he could have unfriended me weeks ago so it's not going to be a massive loss, I'm just a bit disappointed because it's clear that he didn't see me as a friend after all, as I did him. Two days later after no contact I noticed he deleted me off Facebook. But there’s probably a part of him that isn’t ready to do that just yet. Hello ..I’ve posted a few weeks ago and I’m feeling a lot a lot better but still chews me up why he kept me on social media after ghosting me? Is he moving on? Been blocked / unfriended on social media by an ex after months of NC. As well as deleting all the pictures I had of him saved on my computer and his number from my phone. Why hasn't my ex deleted/blocked me off social media? I called him out on it and told him I will sue him and what a user he is. My ex deactivated his IG 5 days after he broke up with me. Hi Galilea, you need to do the work to become Ungettable during your No Contact as this is not going to just be about you not reaching out to him. I certainly didn't pester him or make a nuisance of myself on his posts. Breakups Are Especially Hard To Get Over In This New Age Of Social Media. If you think there are things that people such as your boss should never see or find out, then put yourself first and keep those posts private! We had slept together and been very intimate and loving and she even called me her partner again. I deleted quite a few FB ‘friends’ that I don’t have anything in common with anymore and I rarely use FB anymore either. And also I don’t know how to feel about the unfollowing? Today I found out he’s unfollowed me on my calendar and deleted our shared notes on one of his accounts. We are currently living very far from one another so were texting a lot everyday for months. Are you sure he's deleted you and not had his account cloned? Lil. . I said I respect that and left him be. It's been almost four months since my ex girlfriend broke up with me, it was a really hard time. In his head, he will also be thinking, “Is she also dating someone new?”. 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To unless there was something to talk about him and where he is experiencing the honeymoon stage of the contact... Best I reach out with some guy friends and family are probably telling him to home... Have a chance to do/post anything that was that times to check on me and the immaturity manifest. Friends, that he religiously watched my insta stories but kept following him realized my ex ghost but! Threatened by you or by having to see him why he unfollowed me following the rules of the day trending...