One large, ongoing study of the benefits of exercise found that men who eat chocolate in moderation live longer than those who eat none. What type of cookies do they eat in the Galaxy? How do you make a pool table laugh? We forget that chocolate is derived from cocoa beans-the fruit of the cacao tree-a fruit that is a rich source of these potentially beneficial substances. Why didnt the cow produce any chocolate milk? 3 What did the egg say to the clown? Click here for instructions on how to enable JavaScript in your browser. Betty Crocker. The segments were spun-out into their own series on June 13, 2003 (although the 2003-2004 episodes were also produced originally for Grim & Evil), and continued to air until November 9, 2007. You are the surprise I wanted to get more than I want chocolate. Could be a Chinese Wispa. People can't help being thrown off when slang for testicles are suddenly part of the conversation! Carbon-Holmium-Cobalt-Lanthanum-Tellurium or CHoCoLaTe. C? Laugh more: 87 Car Jokes That Will Drive You Crazy. Because you're making me drool. Whats Boris Johnsons favourite chocolate bar? Because I want to take your top off and gobble you up. Lucy Van Pelt, Peanuts, Biochemically, love is just like eating large amounts of chocolate. TheLaughFactory. How do you A rocky road! Ice Cream Jokes. Am i enough for you? Copy This. What you see before you, my friend, is the result of a lifetime of chocolate. What do you get when you cross beer with a chocolate bar? Its something that should be had on a daily basis. You can taek-won-do.Why is the Toblerone chocolate shaped like a triangle?So that itll fit inside the box.In case you were wondering, chocolate identifies as female.Preferred pronouns are Her/she.I ordered a chocolate clock from Amazon a few months ago and it hasnt arrived yet.Boy, its taking its sweet time getting here.People always ask me how I sneak chocolate into the cinema.WellIve got a few Twix up my sleeve.I once saw Arnold Schwarzenegger eating a chocolate egg.I said to him, I bet I could guess your favourite holiday!He replied, Have to love Easter, baby.Crazy ex-girlfriends are like a box of chocolates.Theyll kill your dog.I love chocolate.Hard candy is for suckers.I put my friends chocolate bars in different wrappers. Do you mind if I share these chocolate with you? You're a chip off the old block (of cookie dough). I would like to be your stash of food that can give you comfort whenever you are sad. What kind of candy bar does an employee crave before the weekend? He rubs it and a genie appears. It is free and the FUNNIEST Newsletter you will ever receive! Consequently, these chocolate jokes can also make your frown turn upside down! Imogen. Chocolate is an excellent energy booster, but it can make kids go crazy if they overeat. The best of all worlds. What is an astronauts favorite chocolate? Enjoy. Surprised, the pope follows up with "He visits every year?! Put eat chocolate at the top of your list of things to do today. So we've rounded up 30+ of the best chocolate jokes, puns, useless facts, and one-liners you . The penguin isn't the neatest eater, and he ends up covered in melted ice cream. John Milton, The Devils Advocate. If you were a concentration gradient, I . Julia Louis-Dreyfus, I probably have some sort of chocolate five times a week. Having Fun since 2020 Jokes Quotes Factory Have a carrot! (Its the only planet with chocolate.). I would go to Italy and eat ice cream if I won the gelato-ry! Have a look! We go together naturally like marshmallows go with chocolate. List of Archie Comics characters - Wikipedia My day got sprinkled with love! Chocolate, dark chocolate, chocolate truffles, Strength is the capacity to break a chocolate bar into four pieces with your bare hands and then eat just one of the pieces. Elaine Sherman, Book of Divine Indulgences, My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. "I know . Id love to be that cookie youre eating because they have the excuse to get close to your lips. The tenth lies. Q: How do you confuse a complete moron? If you were ice cream and i was chocolate sauce, I'd pour my love all over you! TheLaughFactory. a!. Today on a drive, I decided to go visit my childhood home. It can make us feel loved. Hershey. What is a French cats favorite dessert? 7. What does a box of chocolate and life have in common? Why Chocolate Is Better Than Sex: - You can GET chocolate. "Mon, where's the magic?" Here youll find the best chocolate jokes, were sure youll agree. Because she was a Her-She-y bar! I want to go to heaven when I die! But he minded his own business.Why did the chocolate bar go to the dentist?He had a chip in his tooth.Why is a Toblerone triangular?So it fits in the box.There are two types of people in this world:People who love chocolate and liars.What is the opposite of Chocolate?Chocoearly.What Christmas carol do candy bars sing?Almond Joy To The World.Why did the Oreo go to the dentist?Because it lost its filling! What chocolate bar never laughs at jokes? I like a piece every day. Nibbling is not enough, know that I want to devour you fast. They believe its the tomb of Pharoah Rocher.What kind of chocolate do you find in the fluff catching drawer of the dryer? Foiled again. Hershey. Given enough chocolate and coffee, I could rule the world. What is the meaning of life? You are like a box full of sweet that I cannot get hands off. C? Knock knock! See you in the Email! I promise Ill make you forget all the bad things this day brought by being your stash if sweet. He says "I'd like a kipper tie please". Who doesnt love Hershey chocolate jokes? I just got over my addiction to chocolate, marshmallows and nuts.I wont lie, it was a Rocky Road.So I try to eat healthy.But every time I try, a chocolate bar looks at me and snickers.What type of snack is never on time?Choco-late.My cousin works in a chocolate shop.He works behind the bar.Archaeologists have uncovered a mummy in Egypt covered in nuts and chocolate.They believe its Pharaoh Roche.My son is three years old and I took him shopping.When we got home, he had a chocolate bar in his pocket.Now, I didnt buy it and he certainly didnt buy it, so I marched him straight back to the shopping centre and went to the jewellers.A Korean martial artist was giving away chocolate bars.I asked if I could have 2.He said, No. Magic Lamp Returning visitor? So noble a confection, more than nectar & ambrosia, the true food of the gods. French cleric, 1620, Just think of all the wonderful blessings youve been given. ao! Lick my fingers like you could not get enough of me like you do to your sweets. Cao-cao! Family Game: Do you really know your Family? What do you call a lamb covered in chocolate? While he waits, the penguin goes to an ice cream shop and orders a big sundae to pass the time. Use these chocolate related pick up lines about different types of chocolate like candy bars, donuts, cake, drinks, and more. One kid stepped up and slid down, he wished for a river of chocolate, thus he swam in a chocolate river. Ill eat anything! Because I'd love to spread them! Needless to sayHe got his Snickers in a Twix.Two wafers fell into a vat of chocolate.The first one pulled the second one out.The second one said, Thanks, youre a lifesaver!The first one responded, Actually, Im a KitKat.I saw an article about people snorting chocolate powder for a rush.They wanted a Quik high. mi tief three chocolate bars. Q: Why did the Oreo go to the dentist? 9) Looking for Mr. Goodbar: A kid goes to a candy store and can't find his favorite chocolate bar.Chaos ensues. She said she didn't have time. "yeah we know him he's the greatest isn't he? In a hotel sweet.What do you call a lamb dipped in chocolate? Because I want to swallow every last drop of you. Chocolate fantasy in progress. Chocolate is a serious thing! Enjoy our chocolate quotes and jokes by clicking on a link to jump to that topic below. I cannot think of anything sweeter than chocolate than oops of course there is you! The man sitting next to him looks over and says, Eating that many chocolate bars are bad for you. I told my girlfriend that if she wanted her Hersheys bar she had to bark like a dog. Michael Levine, nutrition researcher. I don't. I just don . A Kitty Kat bar. Baby I can never get enough of your sweetness like I can never get enough of chocolate. Are you chocolate pudding, because I want to spoon you all night long. What do you call an ant dipped in chocolate? But it could just be a Chinese whisper. "Chocolate, please," replied the youngster. My love for you is like hot chocolate, I just cant hold on to it. The list wont be complete without the knock knock jokes. After about 20 years of marriage, Im finally starting to scratch the surface of that one [what women want]. How about we get some Titty Roll in the sheets. Lick my fingers like you could not get enough of me like you do to your sweets. It is the best friend of those engaged in literary pursuits. A seven-year-old is sitting on a park bench eating a chocolate bar. 30 Hilarious Cookie Jokes That Definitely Aren't Crumby! The lisp magician gives everyone a chocolate bar. Friend 1: Well, I don't want to go to hell. He swings by every year to make sure that we are doing ok". Chocolate covered aunts. Chocolate doesnt make the world go round, but it sure does make the trip worthwhile! When you milk a brown cow you get chocolate ice cream! Because I want to cum inside your chocolate factory. 85. Can you fit any more Milky Way Chocolate Bars into your desk drawer there, Jim? A pound a day often. 70+ Star Wars jokes, puns, and memes that are so funny and cringey - TUKO Babe, you know what's better than that Tootsie roll? A mum to her son: Yesterday there were two chocolate cakes in the pantry and now theres only one. Your email address will not be published. I used to hate sweets but I came to love those because of you. She screamed, "Oh Crackerjack, better than the Three Musketeers!" Girl, I love how you melt this hard chocolate bar with your mouth, perhaps you can melt something else tonight. Whether dark, milk or white, chocolate is satisfying and decadent. One thats choco-lit! !. I said, "Look you little Reese's Pieces, don't be a Zero, be a Lifesaver. Q: What job function does a complete moron have in an M&M factory? What did the M&M go to college? The alien sees that the pope has become irate at this fact and starts trying to rationalize "Maybe he likes our chocolate better than yours?" Are you chocolate milk? Chocolate Chip Wookiee. She also ate every letter in her name, but left me feeling good: oo! Girl my taste buds almost always craves for chocolate but now it craves for you. Knock knock! Lets check them out! Imogen who? . The monkey that comes over at our place loves chocolate chimp. Are you Kit Kat, because I am going to break you and eat you. Q: Why did the complete moron get fired from the M&M factory? But considering the pandemic that our world is currently facing, the most important thing is that laughter increases immune cells and infection-fighting antibodies, thus improving our resistance to disease. It's been over 2 millenia and we're still waiting for his SECOND coming!" 15+ Easy and Funny Animal Riddles for Kids (with answers) 2023, 50 Funny Bitcoin Jokes That Will Increase Your Investments, 31 Ginger Red-Head Jokes and Quotes to compete with Blondes & Brunettes, Funny Mum jokes DADS cannot compete against. Santa's little helpers sure do have a sense of humor. Gathering his remaining strength, he lifted himself from the bed. If you found these funny cookie jokes and puns ful-filling, check out the rest of LaffGaff for lots more funny jokes such as these: Baker Jokes. Check it out. Glazed and confused. Hey can you accompany me? - The word "commitment" doesn't scare off chocolate. Q: Why dont they make white M&Ms? - You can GET chocolate. Men always leave but chocolate is forever! Flowers and champagne may set the stage, but its chocolate that steals the show. . If you are a chocolate lover, youll surely enjoy reading these chocolate jokes too. Q: Whats the technical difference between cacao and cocoa? You know youre a chocoholic if the bartender tells you youve had enough shots of chocolate syrup for one night. What do you call a womanising chocolate? How dairy! Your email address will not be published. Babe, you look absolutely better when you take that wrapper off of you. A cad-bury. I think it was too dark for me to see the second one.I just ate too much chocolate, nuts and marshmallows. Chocolate Jokes. Chalk Tasty Cookie Jokes And Puns Sure To Make You Crumble Into Laughter Are you a box of chocolate? Keep calm and eat cookies. If you have enjoyed this collection, we sure have more for you. Donut stop believing. A PayDay. "Since I lost my teeth, all I can do is gum chocolate off the M&M's.". Its also not funny to cry over chocolate milk spilled! Mom: Fred, there were two chocolate cakes in the larder yesterday, and now theres only one. Donut worry, be happy! Get updates on new posts directly to your inbox! A Butterfinger! Spanish proverb, And above all Think Chocolate! Chocolate bar prices have really gone up. Its flake news. Hey girl can you be the candy sprinkles to my ice cream? The alien says "Yea, when he FIRST visited our planet we gave him a huge box of chocolates. Kuhtuhluh Report. The bank of friendship cannot exist for long without deposits of chocolate. Because you are the only one that can satisfy me. Wanna take the joke a little far? Why did the M&M go to University? A cup of this precious drink permits a man to walk for a whole day without food. Did you hear about the love affair between Mr. Goodbar and Peppermint Patty? Here are 50 funny Elf jokes, including Elf jokes for kids. He replied, "Well, please make up your mind so I can adjust my chair.". Bob Greene, Chocolate makes everyone smile-even bankers. Im not overweight, just chocolate enriched. Theres M&M shells all over the floor. Nope, all outer space.. Final score: 569 points. A moo-tation.Whats an electricians least favourite ice cream flavour? 131 Star Wars Jokes That Definitely Have The Force 107 Chocolate Jokes That Are Deliciously Funny! 2023 - Jokes Quotes Factory If I have chocolate around, I will eat it. Because you are as sweet as chocolate. Here, have some chocolate. Peter Rogers, Ph.D., Institute of Food Research. Hershey Common and the Heat Ray. A man found a bottle on the beach. Not only that, aside from being delicious and beneficial, it can also be hilarious. ", responds the alien. Nothing else comes to mind to finish this rhyme, so I'll just spit it out - most importantly, you gave us the Star Wars . I am craving for you more than I am craving for hot chocolate. He also suggested cocoa butter for skin treatment, piles and gout. Please accept the terms of our newsletter. Ben Strohecker, chocolatier. The man asks, "Why are you doing that? 2. And it always feels good. Knock knock! Who's there? 131 Star Wars Jokes That Definitely Have The Force. 53 Best Valentine's Day Jokes and One Liners 2023 - Country Living Because I want to swallow every last drop of you. The old man responded, Thats ok. 2. Baby I would trade the entire candy bar in the world for you. It is a source of polyphenols, the same type of antioxidants found in red wine, and the fat it contains is stearic acid, which doesnt affect cholesterol levels. #3. Are you cold? When the old man returned, the young man felt guilty and confessed to taking the peanuts. Q: What do cannibals eat for dessert? Anything is good and useful if its made of chocolate. Are you a box of chocolate? The total text used must be less than one paragraph, and the website must give credit to and link back to this page. Candy! It was discovered that he had a cavity that would have to be filled. Snickers he only snickers! Gurl, you remind me of a box of chocolates..(Why?) So candy bars are a health food. Milk Jokes. What do you call a cow with a stutter that makes chocolate milk? What happens before it rains chocolate? Shock-o-lat. Ive called my dog Cadbury Research Department. Can you be my mocha? A man goes to the nursing home to visit his 84 year-old father. She had Josie 's classic hairdo (complete with a tiny bow), and was a girlfriend of Reggie. Jack Handey, Deep Thoughts, Saturday Night Live, As with most fine things, chocolate has its season. A naked man broke into a church. (LogOut/ Sandra Boynton, Chocolate: the Consuming Passion, Las cosas claras y el chocolate espeso. Which candy bar is handsome, talented, rich, and lacks for nothing? Why did they put Viagra in chocolate bars? The smile looks really good on you. A study says that chocolate may lower your chances of a stroke. Sense of Humor. Ah, chocolate: one of life's simple pleasures. Since Im all about chocolate, how bout a little sugar? Yo mamma so fat, when she walked out of candy land there was nothing left! He turned into a box of chocolates. If youve got melted chocolate all over your hands, youre eating it too slowly. What is an astronauts favorite chocolate? I reckon its just a Chinese whisper. Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. You are lovelier than all the sweets in the world combined. Despite their hard and often seemingly thankless work, elves have a great sense of . Dont fight with me over chocolate because I am not someone to be truffled with! Can you think of anything sweeter than a joke about chocolate? Sweet, smooth, and they usually head right for your hips. Make your lady smile with these jokes. These compounds reduce the stickiness of platelets, cells that play an important role in blood clotting. Why did people make white chocolate? I am craving for you more than I am craving for hot chocolate. ", A race of aliens visits earth one day; they come in peace and surprisingly, they speak English. Are you Kit Kat, because I am going to break you and eat you. Ted, Queer Eye For The Straight Guy, Fruit of all the kinds that the country produced were laid before him; he ate very little, but from time to time a liquor prepared from cocoa, and of an aphrodisiac nature, as we were told, was presented to him in golden cups I observed a number of jars, above fifty, brought in, filled with foaming chocolate of which he took some Bernal Diaz del Castillo, member of Corts force, describing a meal of emperor Montezuma, 1519, Let us celebrate our agreement with the adding of chocolate to milk. A man found a magic lamp on the beach. I mean, at his age what will it do for him?" Copyright 2023 O-hand.com. If there is a food that tastes like you I would definitely get a supply of those forever. A: To get chocolate milk. A Kitty Kat bar! A little boy was taken to the dentist. I will grant you three wishes, says the genie.For my first wish, I would like a boat with a full tank of petrol. The genie snaps his fingers and the boat appears.For my second wish, I would like 10 million pounds. The genie snaps his fingers and a bag appears stuffed with the money.For my final wish, I would like to be so popular that everyone likes me. For the last time, the genie snaps his fingers and the man is turned into a box of chocolates.PETA is like a box of chocolates.They kill dogs.Someone told me there was caffeine in chocolate.If thats true, then why has my dog been asleep for so long, huh?Life is like a box of chocolates.The fatter you are, the shorter it lasts.My uncles joke he just came up with: What are chocolates preferred pronouns?Her, She.They recently found a mummy in Egypt covered in chocolate and nuts.They think it was pharaoh rocher.Why should you always melt chocolate over boiling water?Because if you try and melt it under boiling water, youll die.Charlie and the Chocolate Factory is quite unrealistic but at least they got one thing rightThe moment Charlie found that ticket all the scalpers started coming out.I saw my son eating chocolate even after I confiscated all his Halloween candy. Whos there? The police put out an alert to look for the two hardened criminals. What do you call people who like to drink hot chocolate all year long? Theres more to life than chocolate, but not right now. If there is one thing that every person should try in their lives, it would be having a bite of chocolate! What do you call Chewbacca when he has chocolate stuck in his hair? Because I would like to purchase a sweet like you. Because I would love to make up for if you let me. Every jokes so funny I am enjoying your jokes and best of luck for new jokes. A cad-bury. I only eat chocolate for you, so there will be more of me to love. I asked my wife why she never blinked during foreplay. Copy This. Change). Please add a link to this article. We share them in our weekly newsletter. What do parrots say when they see a candy bar? A: Chocolate covered aunts. Chocolate has also been called the food of the devil, but the theological basis of this claim is obscure. Tap To Copy. - Chocolate Joke [2] Jokes 4 Us - Chocolate Joke [3] Fun Kids Jokes - Chocolate Joke [4] Worst Jokes Ever - Chocolate Joke [5] MyTownTutors - Chocolate Joke [6] SuperJokes - Chocolate Joke [7] Ireland Calling - Chocolate Joke C? My favorite thing in the world is a box of fine European chocolates which is, for sure, better than sex. Look, theres no metaphysics on earth like chocolates. Oh damn I never knew having you would give me the good kind of cavities. Whats a monkeys favourite kind of chocolate? But you have no chocolate! For their dessert, most French cats like the chocolate mousse. Whos there? I can only imagine how people in the park would react! eating chocolate You Hey Cookie, you're the sweetest. Baby you light up my mood like the way chocolate can. Egg Jokes. - You can have chocolate in in public. What are the 4 major food groups? Chocolates are an excellent energy-booster, but they go extremely wild when kids have overeaten. Soon she was fondling my Peter Pan and ZagNut and I knew it wouldn't be long before I blew my Milk Duds clear to Mars that gave her a taste of the old Milky Way. Its not funny when someone steals your chocolate! For their summer holiday, the chocolate couple rented a two-bedroom sweet. If you believe that, you REALLY need to meet that special someone who can change your mind. Talking is frowned at in the local chocolate factory, so I only wispa when I get there. Dont you think having you and sweet food in my life is redundant? Funny Chemistry Jokes and Puns and Periodic Table Jokes - MemesBams How did the hipster burn his mouth on hot chocolate?He drank it before it was cool.What do you get if you dip a cat in chocolate?A Kit Kat bar.What did the astronaut say when he stepped on a chocolate bar?I just stepped foot on Mars.What kind of biscuit can fly a space ship?A chocolate chip Wookie.Whats the suns favourite chocolate bar?A Milky Way.Whats the opposite of chocolate?Choco-EARLY.What do you call stolen cocoa?Hot chocolate.Whats an astronauts favourite chocolate?A Mars bar.What fruit loves chocolate?A coco-nut.Why did the M&M go to University?Because he wanted to be a Smartie.What happens before it rains chocolate?It sprinkles.What do you call a cow with a stutter?Cacao. There are two types of people in this world: People who love chocolate and people who love you. Candy who? Ready for some chocolate jokes? It is crazy, the way you make this heart beat faster the way only sweets can do to me. This term is searched 200,000 times on Google and we wanted to add a few of our own naughty jokes to the mix. Hell hath no fury like a woman who has sworn off fudge and chocolate. Chocolate mousse! Cruller to be kind. It was another Payday and I was tired of Mr. Goodbar. On a cold and gray Chicago mornin where was another little baby chocolate bar born? Needing comforting, I then shared my COCOA with CC. There was a million dollars. In the beginning, the Lord created chocolate, and he saw that it was good. What do you call a lamb covered in chocolate? Life is like a box of chocolates full of nuts! Its important we remember the true meaning of Easter Chocolate is cheaper than therapy and you dont need an appointment. - You can safely have chocolate while you are driving. Dear Star Wars, let us count the reasons we love you. Darling, you are like chocolate, you make everything better. No matter the setting, these 50 hilarious, unsavory jokes are never entirely appropriate. I was going to get you a box of chocolates, but you already have a sweeter box. ), 30 Best Kelly Kapoor Quotes from The Office, 23+ Funny Business Jokes To Share with Friends (or your boss! "Take only one. Taureano Ent says: August 13, 2019 at 2:00 pm The solution: Eat it in the parking lot. The chemist sees the glass as completely full, half in the liquid state and half in the gaseous state. An old man and a young man worked in office next to each other. It must have been so dark I didnt see the other one. Anything tastes better dipped in chocolate. So, without wasting the time, lets enjoy these jokes. A chocolate pun! In 1724, Dr. Richard Brookes claimed that chocolate prolonged life and cured ringworm and ulcers. my favorite is the m&m racist oe lol why are there no white m&ms. What kind of candy bar does an employee crave before the weekend? What Christmas carol do candy bars sing? One day, while the old man is away from his desk, the young man yields to temptation and scarfs down over half of the contents of the jar.