crayon_witch 2018-12-04 16:06:30 UTC #9. For fifteen years I was ashamed and embarrassed of something I had absolutely no control over. thank you for this post. I’m currently writing a short, LGBT prequel story (to one of my WIP novels) about a psychiatric intern that falls in love with a patient. I’m not trying to shame anyone with a mental illness, the people who are brave enough to speak about their journey and raise awareness or the ones who have not reached that point. The line sometimes blurs between the person's true self and the mental illness, but the line nonetheless exists. My girlfriend was not the love interest in the novel of my life; that is to say, mental illness is not something to romanticize, something that we should hope our significant others have just so we can shield them from it with our love. Say, what was the name of that show on Netflix that got criticism for this? I wasn’t aware of it at the time, but I romanticized mental illness and mental health issues. She was someone who would walk me to the dining hall because I was scared to eat alone. Press question mark to learn the rest of the keyboard shortcuts. If every time someone posts a sappy quote on their Tumblr, who’s to say if it’s a cry for help? The Mental Illness, more than ever, deserves respect due to its devastating results if not treated daily. ( Log Out /  This influence can be seen in the shows Euphoria and 13 Reasons Why. Mental Illness: A wide range of conditions tha I feel like those two mental illness are extremely romanticized in the media and it's kind of upsetting. It's best to sometimes to even put yourself in another's shoes. Sorry, your blog cannot share posts by email. So please, if you decide to write a romance on a mental illness, make it more realistic. Explain things that have helped you or things you want to do to get better. What’s more, you deserve better. RAPE. Remind them of the everyday struggles. I write because I believe that authentic mental health writing is badly needed in a sea of technical jargon and fear-driven, sensational headlines. Then, in my freshman year of college, I was raped in a dorm room. Whether it was watching Norman Bates stab a motel guest to death in the shower in Alfred Hitchcock’s Psycho, reading articles that dramatize and demonize mental illness, or seeing posts on social media that romanticize depression and anxiety, most have seen mental illness portrayed inaccurately in the media. Having a disorder isn't cute and quirky and these type of stories aren't needed. I’ve heard time and time again, from friends both with diagnosed mental illnesses and without, that, “If I only found someone to love me, things would be better. When a razor used for shaving becomes so much more. Thank-you! There is absolutely nothing romantic about a mental disorder. They romanticize and glamorize it publicly on social media and similar websites, in particular, the world's most popular micro-blogging platform -- tumblr. It’s extremely important to love those dealing with mental illness, don’t get me wrong. However, over time fewer authors have continued to rely on mental illness as a tool or tactic; realistic representations of mental illnesses are finally beginning to manifest in literature. Mental health issues are real, and they ruin lives. It's best to sometimes to even put yourself in another's shoes. But it seems that the movement to de-stigmatize them has gotten horrifically confused with a movement to romanticize them. Mental illness then becomes desensitized because “everybody has it.” Having a mental illness doesn’t make you tragic or beautiful. We live in a generation where mental health issues are so romanticised they seem to have become desirable. It’s about living life together, as equals. Neither is it something to digest or to move forward from. Menu. Loving someone who is dealing with mental health issues means listening to them when they need it, but giving them space when they need that instead. Showing the ugly consequences is important for not glorifying it (at the same time, don't overdo it. But it seems that the movement to de-stigmatize them has gotten horrifically confused with a movement to romanticize them. There are many factors that play a role in the reinforcement of this stigma. Romanticizing mental illness is stripping away all the unpleasant realities of mental illness and turning mental illness into something beautiful that someone would want for the aesthetic. The controversial “13 Reasons Why” is an example of a bad representation of mental illness. I am going to answer this question from the perspective of a staff member of an inpatient psychiatric unit. By Kayla McEwen • PS Behrend Contributor • Mental Health March 11, 2018 at 9:00am. The romanticism of mental illness hurts people who actually suffer from a mental illness. According to Google Definitions (Which do hold the latest Definitions for words) the definition of romanticize, trauma and mental illness are as follows: Romanticize: deal with or describe in an idealized or unrealistic fashion; make (something) seem better or more appealing than it really is. Dear Hope is a community driven site that features work from across the world! A topic people have lost their lives to. I mainly write poetry and use it as a tool to work through my experiences and feelings, so lots of my writing, especially when things ain’t going to well, are focused around that and my mental state. Romanticizing mental illness is portraying depression as a beautiful sorrow that makes the character stand in the corner and give overrought monologues that read like low-quality emo poetry until they're cured of their sadness by the main character's penis. Mental illness is not something that mysterious writerly-type characters live with until the eleventh hour of the plot, when their often also-somewhat-mysterious, but kind and understanding love interest heals all their ails simply by loving them unconditionally. I was barely interested in romance for a while, and the idea of trusting someone with my body in any way terrified me. Yet, it’s still important to think about how the efforts to reduce this stigma has actually led to more problems. Now let's look at the book I love to rag on, Twilight. I watched it like two summers ago it was disturbing. That’s not poetic. The level of truth in this is disputed by some who have recovered and others who claim to be experts in the field of mental health; they state that your mental illness is never your identity. The most casual incidents of physical encounters with strangers – a bump on the bus downtown, a glance into the eyes of someone who resembled my attacker, a grope from behind at the club – reduced me to a shaking, anxious shell. Leonard is dealing with this mental illness as he tries to… That’s reality. Well, I’m doing it anyway. As I healed from my rape, my girlfriend was not my storybook love interest. Many authors use mental illness as a tool or a metaphor, with little regard to the real-world impact of these types of issues. Sometimes it feels like romanticization of mental illness is everywhere these days and this feeds mental health stigma. And that is dangerously tragic in itself. Studies have shown a link between mental illness … There’s nothing poetic about trying to find your best friend at the bottom of a bottle. This can be harmful because 90% of those who’ve died of suicide had an underlying mental illness, according to NAMI. The reality is, the more people romanticize mental illness, the less it’s taken seriously. As years passed, I gradually grew into my identity as a young queer woman and, although I believe Post-Traumatic Martyr is a somewhat lifelong condition, I began to believe that there was a reason I was still here. Change ), You are commenting using your Twitter account. These disorders take lives, and they’re nothing to show off. 6. It isn’t something we should cross our fingers to be saved from. Ladies and gentlemen, The Fault in Our Stars DID NOT romanticize cancer. There is a huge stigma surrounding mental illness. Mental health issues, such as anxiety and depression, are among the reasons that millennials’ health is not as good as that of the previous generation, a new report finds. It was a bandaid, and a support system, but it didn’t stop someone from living with mental health issues. As I healed, she healed too. Of course this is my opinion. It can hinder them from receiving the real help they need. At fifteen, I was your average blunt-bangs-wearing, journal-writing, hanging-out-in-a-graveyard teenage queer girl stereotype. Neither is it something to digest or to move forward from. Studies have shown a link between mental illness and creativity. Memento depicts a man suffering from anterograde amnesia. I’ve been told I Romanticize my mental illness and that I absolutely should not do that. First and foremost, she was my trusted partner and friend. This Netflix hit not only shows what it’s like for women to live with a variety of mental illnesses, but the effect that being incarcerated has on them, too. As for my fiction writing, there’s more … But I’m a bit nervous I could accidentally end up romanticizing mental illness. Rather than writing poetically about your struggles and leaving it in a pit of despair, write a resolution. I was a protagonist in desperate need of saving – except I already had a girlfriend, and we’d been together for over three years. She faced as much anger and frustration about what happened to me, as well as unnecessary and unwarranted guilt that she hadn’t been there to stop it. For some reason it isn't proper to talk about it despite the fact that every year, 42.5 million adults in the United States are diagnosed with some form of mental illness.The conversation about mental illness is incredibly limited which makes it that much easier for media to romanticize it. Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Have discussions about how mental illness affects people from all walks of life. It’s the uncomfortable truth. And that is dangerously tragic in itself. 6 min read “All the Bright Places.” Photo: Walter Thomson/Netflix. With low self-esteem and a deep sense of loss after my mother’s death, I was a mess of Post-Traumatic Martyr Syndrome (that’s not real – it’s my name for how survivors of loss feel the constant need to sacrifice themselves for ‘the greater good’ because they lived and the other person did not) and striped arm warmers courtesy of the mid-2000s. I ached for someone who I could save – or the other way around – from the trials and traumas that life hands us. Because I'm tired of seeing people romanticize the idea of having a mental illness. Writing Heals my best antidepressant. How Can The Media Help To De-Romanticize Mental Illness? Or portraying autism as this wholly beautiful, poetic thing that creates antisocial savants with beautiful minds, while completely leaving out all the ways that autism negatively affects the lives of autistic people. The site may not work properly if you don't, If you do not update your browser, we suggest you visit, Press J to jump to the feed. It’s not an issue that should be demonized or stigmatized, either, because I believe it can happen to anyone, whether it’s through traumatic life events or genetic predisposition. I have talked in length about how denial is a big issue and how depression is seen as western propaganda. Authors who show that mental illness comes from breaking social convention and the rules turn those who suffer said maladies into monsters. ( Log Out /  Glorifying and romanticizing self-harm, suicide, mental illness and eating disorders can lead to normalizing these things. Mental illness is an area frequently misunderstood by authors and readers alike. He was named after his grandmother. Email wemustbebroken@gmail.com to inquire or have your work featured. Mental gymnastics and self-diagnosis. Change ), You are commenting using your Facebook account. Just portray mental illness realistically and sensitively, avoiding both sanitizing and ableist stereotypes, and you should be good. Jason Gardner (the patient) is currently getting treatment for severe PTSD and depression. I didn’t need to be saved from what happened to me, and it wouldn’t have been possible even if I did. Let's Talk - Romanticism of Mental Illness in the Music Industry. It would do well to ask a mental health professional to act as a sensitivity reader and correct any mistakes you may have missed. The conversation about mental illness is incredibly limited which makes it that much easier for media to romanticize it. That sort of thing, you know? It creates a distorted vision of depression and other mental illnesses, and also leads to those feelings of hopelessness that the posts depict. That's the best year on record, 18 out of 1.75 million boys. This is because it could give an inaccurate representation of mental illness and suicide, negatively influencing young and impressionable viewers. Pain equals pain, and #painisntpretty. After I was raped, I was the kind of person I would have read about in a book and rooted for: the sad girl, traumatized and lonely, isolating herself in her dorm room, watching episodes of Dexter on repeat to quell her newfound insatiable anger problems. This generation is obsessed with mental illness, but even more so, it is obsessed with romanticizing it. I would be okay.”. Whether it’s some trendy post about what mental health “is” or how people with mental health illnesses “actually” are, it’s pretty likely to be somewhere in the social media sphere. I wonder, though, if some of our acceptance of mental illness has been amplified and distorted to romanticize mental illness, while the actual victims of it are still met with… I was fully prepared to discuss the inadvisability of writing a LGBT romance where the girl gets the guy. The temptation to examine the human condition through characters who think or behave in ways we find strange is a common theme in literature, and yet more and more of society is waking up to the fact that frivolous depictions of mental illness can have serious real-world implications. It doesn't appear in any feeds, and anyone with a direct link to it will see a message like this one. By this, I mean that it’s difficult to understand what it’s like to live with it unless you have experienced it yourself. Make it real. I’ve grown comfortable in my own body and mind, but that’s through my own hard work and volition, not through the fact that anyone else has given me permission to be okay with what happened to me simply by loving me. Mental illness is not an appealing trait; it is not a quality on the romantic checklist of men or women. It’s about showing your support, but understanding that the problems they’re facing may not be something that can be ‘fixed.’ (It’s incredibly damaging and ableist to paint every illness and disability story as something to overcome, anyway.) (Dreamstime/TNS) Depression is not uncommon amongst teenagers and older children approaching adolescence. It's not about presenting mentally ill characters as the center of romance arcs (that's generally pretty good, since we don't get a lot of representations of mentally ill characters in romantic scenarios), it's about whitewashing and sanitizing the illness itself until it doesn't feel anything like the real, very serious thing that affects the lives of millions of people worldwide. I’d already seen bipolar disorder in family and friends, watching someone cycle from a manic flurry of activity and then quickly disappear for weeks, even months, without a single word. Mental illnesses are getting overlooked because of stigmatization by people who belittle them. If you’re portraying mental illness, show your audience the real side of it. The more you romanticize it, the more you hurt us. Man, it took me three or four reads to catch the "his" in "want’s to do his best to help Jason" before I realized Heidi was a man. This generation is obsessed with mental illness, but even more so, it is obsessed with romanticizing it. Make it clear that although “X” isn’t great, “Y” can make it better. Release. Change ). However, growing up, I knew that mental illness was something awful. I longed for an emotionally tortured soul who might be able to accompany me into the late hours of the night, kept awake by insomnia, angry at the world for its discrimination. This is a serious problem and I don´t want that you are hurting yourself. I’m talking to the people who pretend they have one for the attention or because it makes them feel like people care. 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